Homeschooling made my child more shy, and you know what? I’m okay with that.
School socialization a success?
Sure, she doesn’t get the “socialization” that made her come out of her shell on a daily basis, but why is that the epitome of social success anyway? Why does my child have to be a social butterfly in order to be deemed a successful human being? Tell me, why should I push her past her comfort zone on a daily basis, when she thrives within it?
Homeschooling made my child more shy, or so they say, and I’m okay with that. She used to talk to strangers, think everyone was her friend, and generally lacked an idea of security boundaries. I’m glad there is now a filter between her and someone that may not have the best of intentions. That filter is herself. She now hesitates before being besties with anyone who talks to her for a split second. She now hesitates before trusting someone and accepting an invitation to their home. She now hesitates before divulging her personal information. I’m okay with that.
Shy is bad?
Some of us would do well to enact a bit more shyness. Some of us would learn more if we talked less and listened more. Some of us would notice the details of what is around us if we sat quietly, assessing the room before jumping right in.
Is it wrong to be extroverted and to enjoy talking to strangers? No. As a safety issue, I enjoy knowing that my daughters friends are people she has known for a bit of time rather than any new and fun person becoming her best friend nearly overnight.
I don’t see why we, as a society, glamorize those who jump in the spotlight and look down on those who would rather quietly learn, listen, and observe. We need both in a society for balance. Not everyone can be the star of the show. If my daughter doesn’t want to be the star, I’m okay with that.
If I’m being honest, one of my hopes with homeschooling is that my daughter will become a little more calm. (I don’t know that I’d say shy – but similarly!) Those boundaries are really missing in our life, and I would love to have them!
That’s a good way to put it – boundaries. Exactly.
Assalamu alayki sister, I always think that being shy but not being withdrawn is a good thing. There are hadiths about shyness being a good characteristic to possess which I’m sure you know yourself so hamdulillah she has it. May it be with her always.
Walaykum Assalam,
Yes, shyness is a virtue, Alhamdulilah. Thanks for stopping by! 🙂