Sisterhood and other things

Women get a bad rep for being catty, back biting, and petty. In truth, groups of women can absolutely be that way, and I’ve been witness to this myself.

But women can also be the pillow with which you lay your head down and the firm mattress with which you rest your tired body after a struggle that is beyond what others imagine.

We have kids, we face financial and health struggles, or we witness death in the family, and when we have a sisterhood with other women, they surround us with their love and support in the form of casseroles, soup, flowers, and blankets.

There’s a beauty in the support women give to other women, and in my experience, in particular between women who stay home with their kids.

You see, some of us are utterly dependent on our husbands for the financial maintenance of the home. It is a trust in Allah that we have placed so much trust in one income earner in the home so we can focus on raising the family. When we are out of commission, or our husband is, you see a beautiful thing – the rallying of other women to pick up the pieces when possible. To give relief in times of need. To give anything they have to gift a sliver of normalcy.

I have been so utterly fortunate to have multiple circles of women I know that jump at the opportunity to help another in their community. They hear a whisper of a call for help and come running. They are the glue that holds community together. They are the village we all hope so desperately for when we are plagued with long days and short nights.

I don’t know how I’ve been so lucky to be surrounded by such amazing women. Such women that care and take care of those around them. Such women that will bake you a casserole and stop by to talk about classic literature, toxic masculinity, or the meaning of life. Such women are the oxygen in the lives of so many, without whom we suffocate in a small world of our own, surrounded only by the needs of those in our home who may not see our needs in return.

I pray that those who do not have such a tribe in their communities find it as it is such a life giving force that it benefits not just you, but your kids, your family, and your homeschool. I don’t know how to find it, but I have to wonder if first being that person, exhibiting that you are one to rally to the call of one in need, is the first step.

I have not always been that person. I am not always that person. I’m utterly ashamed at how I have not been there for people that I care about in their time of need. Maybe it’s age, maybe it’s seeing tragedy upon tragedy strike the mothers in our community; I can’t say, but over time I’ve had to come to the hard realization that not stepping on toes or being worried that I’m going to help wrong is worse than not helping at all.

The first step in this beautiful sisterhood that crosses boundaries is being a sister to those around you. I pray that I can be that sister.